Is it wrong that I fantasise about hiring an escort? I feel like there's an ethical dilemma there. I do though. I've been trying to figure out why. And what makes it tricky is I know the other side of the coin. I think it would be nice for someone to come and lavish their attention on me. But its not like it would be real. That's the funny part. Having said that, what was real with Jake or Andrew? We were both just using each other (not to say it wasn't a happy arrangement though). With hiring someone I would just be fooling myself.
I would hire a man. Even though I prefer women, I prefer gay women (not gay for pay, as they call it in Mexico), and I'm much more picky with my ladies than with my men. I have a type! And how would it work? Typically sex is over when he comes, and in the sex trade industry once the show is over there's not much point in hanging around. So my question is, would he race to the finish then leave? I wouldn't want to hire someone who sucked. That would be so disappointing.
And only staying for an hour. That would also suck. I have made a rule that all of my hook ups must be sleep overs. That part of it is just as important to me as the sex. It differentiates it from work. Well, that and the fact that it's generally good.
I guess I just want a fuck buddy. No strings attached, uncomplicated, minimal talking, exciting, adventurous sex. Is that too much to ask for? Ha ha. Obviously!!!
Honestly, as I write I know it's more than that. The idea of paying for someone's body is hot. I've kind of started to venture down the other side of the BDSM street. The dominate side. This is new for me. I've always been the sub/bottom, but I'm loving this. And having them be mine for the hour is kinda hot. It's a little degrading for them and that turns me on.It's funny, because there've been situations where I did not feel good about what I was doing, bit I've never felt degraded because I was getting paid, yet I have this perspective being on the other side.
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