Cranky

     I give up. I've been trying to be in a good mood all week, and it's just not happening. So I give up. It's 2pm on a Sunday afternoon, and I'm in bed with my pj's on. I've already had two calls today, almost three. They were all weird.  I want to explain my living situation first though. I have an apartment. A beautiful little place just outside of downtown that I've worked very hard to make my own. My Uncle has a place about five blocks away, that he is having me house sit over the winter while he is in Mexico. Originally, he said I could have it as of yesterday, so months ago, I arranged for a friend to sublet my place. He let his lease on his place go, and has been living with his friend for the last two weeks, until my place became available. My Uncle changed his departure date to the beginning of November, so for the last two months I have been scrambling to find a place to live for these two weeks. Many have offered couches, but if I'm sleeping on a couch, I may as well sleep on my own couch. I seriously don't want to push the boundaries of this friendship like that. I don't want to be living with a dude I'm not sleeping with. So I said I need a closet, a door, a bed, and no pets or smokers (allergies). So demanding, I know. Frankly, the majority of my friends are in their 20's and don't have vacant second bedrooms. Those who do, seem to have pets. My Aunt found a place with her friend, who I should be able to stay with. It should be fine. Should. We all know how I feel about that word. Should doesn't exist. It either is, or it isn't. Tuesday night, I was stressing to the point of not being able to sleep. I texted her in the morning for this friends contact info, so I could meet her and find out where she lives. My aunt replied saying that wasn't going to work out, and would I be able to live with my mother for the two weeks. Ha. No! So we scrambled to find me somewhere new to live, and now I'm way far in the south end of town living with this grandma who reminds me sooo much of my step-mother it's uncanny. They even kind of look a like. She's weird, but seems nice enough. She dances when she talks. Like with a hop, skip and butt wiggle. I'm worried she's going to snoop in my room. I don't have anywhere to put my work supplies, so I have to have them in here. I can't leave them in the car, because it drops below freezing at night now. Condoms don't work so well after being frozen. I haven't seen too much of her so far, so we'll see how it goes.
      My first call woke me up at ten after eight this morning. It was a double. I didn't have much time to prepare for it, so I was racing around digging through boxes trying to find stockings, and what-not. Cathy was already up, and chatted with me while I did my make up and shaved my legs. I have to speak slowly to her or she doesn't understand. She had a brain injury when she was a teen-ager. I'm not used to having people around in the morning, let alone being chatty. Ha ha. I'm not really a morning person. Like I say, she's really nice though, I just don't have time to chat in the morning. I usually only have half an hour to straighten my hair, do my make up, and get out the door. This morning, I had to shave as well. I hope I didn't offend her.
      As I said this call was a double. I'd worked with with girl before. Notoriously late, but she's alright to work with. She often makes the most inappropriate jokes, and I think "Oh, gawd, did she just say that!?" and wait to see the clients reaction. Oddly enough boys like bathroom jokes. Who knew?! The boys this morning were two brothers. I know I've talked about this before, but as a girl, I just don't get it! Seriously! Who does that? I just couldn't picture sitting around with another chic and say, "You wanna get fucked? I know we only have this one room here, but it will be fun! Lets call some hookers over!" The concept is completely foreign to me. Whatever. Usually in double calls, I'll take the dude into the bathroom so we can fuck privately (It works better than you'd think) But this morning, I got the vibes it just wasn't going to pan out that way. It was totally like the brothers were trying to one up each other. And the girl too. I don't give oral with out getting paid extra, but she did. I thought about making an exception, so that it would be fair, but then I though, "Fuck that." ha ha.
      Afterwards, my co-worker and I were talking about it and she laughed, "Yeah, it's like we weren't even there. At one point they even made eye contact with each other."
    "Is it weird for brothers when one's cock is so much bigger than the others? I wonder if it creates issues? They were so competitive"
     Mid-session my dude apologized for, "Being so good" HA! HAAA!  He told me that he likes being bitten and scratched. Biting is a fetish of mine, but I didn't get off on this. I still went to town on him though. At one point I felt the muscle tearing, and he told me not to hold back. Such a show off. That boy is going to be bruised tomorrow!
      When the call was over she had to go half way downtown, and I had  nothing to do, so I gave her a ride instead of making her call a cab, then I headed home. I was almost there when I realised I couldn't go in there any more. Such a weird feeling. I still have a key. All my stuff is still in there, but I can't go. I went to the Starbucks parking lot and sat with my thoughts with the sun streaming into my car. When the air is cold like it is, feeling the hot sun on your bare legs is such a nice feeling.
      My next call came pretty quick. He was out by the airport. He really wanted me to shower for him. I told him I don't shower with clients. I joked that I'd have to re-do my hair and make-up and this girl is high maintenance. It's not really a joke. It's true. But he kept pushing it.
      "Buddy, I'm clean, I assure you. I showered this morning." Arg. This guy was annoying. He wanted my measurements, and I told him I'm a B cup, size medium. He asked me if I had big boobs. See, this is my crankiness coming through. Why do you want my measurements if  you don't know what it means. Why not just say do you have big boobs? Ugh. He agrees to have me over, and I tell him that I can be there in 20 minutes. After I hang up, I realize I have to make a stop on the way, and I ended up being 15 minutes late. I felt pretty bad about it.
    "Yeah...." He said, like he's trying to make me feel extra guilty, "Check out was at 12..."
      "Well you called me at 11:30, so I'm not sure what you thought would happen..." I say. I will accept no guilt.
      "Oh, no, it's ok. They said I could get a late check out."
      Then what's the issue? I wanted to ask. Did I mention he's was a SPD. Of course. Whatever. I was out of there in 17 minutes.
      The third call was my first client ever. I feel a little weird about this guy. He's actually a friend of a friend who was looking for an escort. There's nothing really wrong with him. He's just a regular guy. We started doing business even before I got my license. Because he was friends with my friend for years, he would come to my house, and he knows my real name. This is something that I would NEVER do now. And I never thought I would have to do it again. He went on a trip in early March, and I haven't heard from him since until yesterday. He wanted to meet me in a parking lot, then drive me to his place. I'm assuming so I could get out in his garage, and his neighbors would never see me. Makes sense. When he told me where he wanted to meet, I phoned him to get the actual address of where we were going. I'd already talked to Andrew about being my safety call, as this was not through the agency. He kind of skated over telling me the address while explaining his covert plan.
      "You see, the thing is, I don't get into other peoples car's," I tell him plainly.
       He continues to explain the why's and whatnot, like it would change my mind or something, but the best I can offer him is I could park around the street, and walk. No deal. Oh well. I don't care. The great thing about this job is even when things are slow, like they are now (slow = only 4 calls last week) I'm still far from being desperate for money. I don't need to take risks.